Charlie's Angels - An Abomination.

The first twenty minutes of the new Charlie's Angels was so inept, crazed, and alienating that it made the Hawaii Five O reboot look like The Wire. Right from the outset it was a big bowl of wrong. Charlie's voice was weedy and inconsequential. OK, I know John Forsythe is dead, so he's out of the question, but, even in his current state, I think Mr. Forsythe would have done a better job than new incumbent Victor Garber. 

The show kicked off and we were plunged into the 'all action' climax of a mission. Characters we didn't know tear arsing around, but hey, they did it and it was time to celebrate. I was glad to see Nadine Velazquez was one of the Angels. I think we all liked her as Catalina in My Name Is Earl. So I thought "at least she is in it." Well, I was wrong there, about a minute later she was blown up. Oh no, is that Catalina out of it? I moaned.  Confused and alienated, I was then hit by Bosley. If Charlie is a father figure then Bosley is the kindly uncle, middle aged, worldly wise, and protective. But not here, here he wanders around, lifeless, like Enrique Iglesias on Temazepam. The big bowl of wrong just got bigger. As if that wasn't bad enough we had to endure lines from grieving Angels, like 'I didn't know my heart could ache this much' and as all this is going on, the show hadn't slowed down for a second, in fact the only time anyone was still was when they were feverishly tapping on their iPads. I gave up when a boat was being shot to bits, I had no idea why and I didn't care. 

When I had deleted it and took it off series link, don't you always feel like a prawn when you realise you had a duffer on series link? I thought to myself, that had to be cancelled. Sure enough, only four episodes were aired in America. I suppose we should applaud the hip and happening E4 for bringing us such a first rate US export. Please tell me it was thrown in as a make weight in a bigger deal. I'll bang on about it once again, we get this unspeakable crap and no UK station will pick up Breaking Bad. Madness, madness.

Over