Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. So, like an idiot, I came back to Geordie Shore. But what was I expecting? A whole new change of format, where nine philosophy graduates, from Newcastle University, sit on sofas and talk about the state of the world. No, much as I'd like to think I'm that lofty, I wanted more of the same, with the same cast of devil may care cretins. And boy did I get it. But we did get two new characters to spice up the pot in the shape of Ricci (sic) and Rebecca. New not different. With the exception of Greg all our old faves were back on board.
We got the early scene where Charlotte's mum told Gaz, basically, not to do her daughter in the hot tub and not to make her cry. You didn't need to be a philosophy graduate from Newcastle University to figure out exactly what would happen there. But even I was shocked by the speed it transpired. The ascorbic Vicky and the crazed, computer generated, Sophie both have boyfriends now so they declared there would be no 'tashing on' (is that the phrase?) for them. Well, after one episode Sophie's promise is still intact. As you would expect, Vicky went for new girl Rebecca like a lion goes for a gazelle and you always get a good belly laugh when Vicky complains about someones attitude. I'll bet she has a fight when she looks in the mirror. Of the others Jay is still basically Jay, and I don't know how he missed out on the part of Bane in the upcoming Batman film. And Holly is pursuing James like Pepe Le Pew used to chase after those cats he thought were skunks. On the upside we have a new house Chlamydia Heights, which looks like a converted warehouse probably so all the mess can be easilyscooped up and skipped at the end of the series.
The first episode was much like every other we have seen. I love their almost maniacal passion for those Groundhog Day nights out they have. One of the joys of this episode was Rebecca saying she was 'classy' only for a cut to her blind drunk and falling off the bed in instalments. This mob are obviously a gift to the programme's makers. So I'm sure we will be in for much much more the same, but it's what we want. To quote Michael Corleone ' Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in'.
Over
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