Splash - Celebrities in Water

ITV's new Saturday night show Splash is firmly aimed at the group of people who are still waiting for Celebrity Wrestling to come out on Blu Ray. Hosted by Gabby Logan and Vernon Kay, under the watchful eye of Tom Daley and eagerly lapped up by the most easily pleased audience this side of Mrs Brown's Boys, Splash is basically celebrities falling into water. There you have it.

"The atmosphere here at Luton is electric" Gabby enthused, but the only way this would be electric is if someone threw a toaster in the pool. Vernon seemed a little less sure of himself perhaps because, for some unknown reason, he was dressed like Chevy Chase in the Vacation films and having to use the word divers so much. But no show like this is complete without a panel so we had the cut and paste group the ITV so love. First up the something or other to do with Team GB and Tom Daley expert, at the end a bloke called Leon who was the requisite Mr. Nasty and stuck in the middle Jo Brand. Yep, Jo Brand someone we all would associate more with diving into Greggs at lunchtime than diving into a swimming pool. But there she was, her jokes falling flat even with this enthusiastic audience. Then there was Tom Daley, the Olympic golden boy, well bronze boy, smiling and telling us the life changing, roller coaster, journey the celebs had all been on. 

But at least the ITV pulled out all the stops with the celebrities. Bruce Springsteen, Woody Allen, Madonna, and Simon Cowell were not in Splash. No we had someone from theSugarbabes because she looked great in a bikini, the waiter bloke from Benidorm ( I know ), Omid Djilili, Helen Leaderer ( no me neither ), and Jenny Falconer. Well if that line up didn't keep you viewing until the end nothing would. And to boot, they nearly all cried at some point, a life changing, roller coaster journey, can do that to a celeb you know. 

Turns out most of them entered the water like a depth charge or an ironing board and that was quite funny. Peter Kay's Running Bomb does seem to hang over proceedings. But then it was up to the public to vote the phone lines open for a stunning six and a half minutes. Wow you can just imagine the mad scramble in homes up and down the land. Omid won, leaving Jenny Falconer and the Benidorm waiter to take part in the Splash Out, sorry Splash Off. Where they jumped into the water again. The Benidorm bloke won his way to the semi final, but like hundreds of thousands of others, I won't be seeing him there. 

Although people have joked about it, shows like Splash really do make you think Celebrity Bomb Disposal is getting nearer.

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