Armchair Assassins TV is proud to launch its latest show. Britain's Best Baked Allotment Celebrity Antiques Property Challenge. Two sets of celebrities, ( captained by 70's pop star Barry Blue and 80's megastars The Reynolds Girls ) will find the best, most attractive allotments in the country and then cover them in pastry. The excitement of seeing quite famous people struggle with acres of puff pastry will no doubt quicken the pulse of the viewing public. But not only that, the celeb teams will then have to go and find the best value antique they can lay their grubby hands on to garnish the top of their baked allotment. If that wasn't enough then they must sell the cooked allotment to a smug couple, with too much money, looking for a quieter life in the country.
Armchair Assassins TV has yet again upped the ante when it comes to Must See Event Television. And because of this we will be giving all our subscribers free Crash Carts* just in case their hearts stop with sheer excitement.
Some more great news we can now reveal that the host of BBACAPC ( as we like to call it ) will be Bubble from whatever the hell Big Brother series he was in and he will be ably assisted by that woman who came third in the third series of X Factor. So if you haven't subscribed to Armchair Assassins TV, you'd better get a move on.
*Please note only one Crash Cart per household.
Head of Programming.
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